Ice Cream in Winter

I am currently eating ice cream. Plain. Vanilla. It tastes good. Why is this? I mean, it's winter, ice cream should be a no go! I mean it is making me shiver slightly but I love it. It makes me happy. Here are the reasons I think everyone should eat ice cream in winter.

1. It tastes nice

2. It won't melt

3. It makes you happy

4. It's out of the normal things people do in Winter

5. I believe it cures the flu, despite what Wiki Answers says

6. This has no relation but I thought the answer was funny

7. Sugar is good energy, even for a short period of time (and it helps after lunch when you feel tired after a nice big meal)

8. It's a nice shape when they give it to you. Like a really nice swirl

9. Kids look so funny when they have ice cream all over there face! You know they enjoyed it

10. Because you just bloody should!

I thank you.

A Life For Sale

Has anyone ever felt this way? Things just NEVER seem to be going right no matter how hard you try? I've been feeling like this today, and to be honest, I fairly sick of it. Things happen around me that ARE BY NO MEANS MY FAULT and then I get blamed.

This is increasingly making me upset, even though it's not my fault people are stupid around me, so I have finally, after millions of years of deliberating and umm-ing and ahh-ing, I have come to a conclusion.

Life hates me. That is correct. No matter what I do it is never right, no matter how hard I try I always fail. So why don't I just give up and sell my shit life and buy a new one? Seriously, you can, a guy from Australia did it when his fiancé left him, he sold his entire life on Ebay http://www.alife4sale.com/index.htm is his official website. I think I want to follow suit to be honest. Could I ever? I really don't know if I am honest. But how awesome would it be if we could all just sell up when we are fed up and do what he is doing? Aspiring, it really is.

I'm just sick of everything. I'm not a selfish person, that is the major part of my problem. I 've grown to think about everyone else first before I think about myself, to the point where I don't actually look after or care about myself any more. But I think it's about time I took a stand. The majority of people around me are selfish and only think for themselves, isn't it about time I started to as well? It's easier said than done though. Yet another problem.

So, what's a girl to do hey?

I wish my life was for sale.

Things in the Post

I thought I would be quite random today and rather than bitching about society/life/government/life and thought I would talk about something nice. THE POST!

How amazing do you feel when you get mail? I don't even care if it my credit card bill, the fact I got something in the post makes it SO much more exciting. I don't get mail very often, so when I do it's like a mini party in my head.

OK, so the Royal Mail isn't the best service in the world and I am sure many things have been lost in the post for some of us, but you can't honestly say that when something you didn't expect comes through the post you get all excited and “Oooo!!! I wonder what it is!!” It's that 30 seconds of excitement that get me the most, it makes my day.

So as much as mail services can be really poo, I love getting mail in the post and I think that everyone else should be grateful when they get mail, even if it is a bill, because some people don't even get that. ALL HAIL MAIL!

I hate Winter.

Now I am sure some of you may love winter, the cold, snow, frost, big coats and wonderful hats and scarves. WHY I ask you? What is so good about you freezing your arse off every time you leave the house? I hate it the most because, well, I've always hated the cold. We have a mutual hatred for each other. It hates me, especially when my car is so old that every 2 days I have to put oil and water in it otherwise there is no heat and I have to then stop at a petrol pump in the FREEZING COLD and pick up ice metal to fill up the radiator, thinking this is how I am going to die. And I hate it because I always get sick, at least 3 – 4 times a year with the flu, with every year getting worse, the car issue again and the fact that it flares up my eczema no end. My hands look like a 70 year old woman's and I'm not 70! Not even close, over 50 years off in fact.

This makes me wonder why my parents ever moved here. They came from India you see, which is fair enough, better life etc, but why here? Why not America, or Australia, somewhere HOT! I suppose America is worse than here... but oh well. Choices choices.

I will soon be needing a new car as mine is getting on. It needs a pension really. I think the government should pay haha.

But no, I do very much hate winter, I hate the snow, the frost and the coats!! I'd much rather be warm than cold, at least then I wouldn't get so bloody ill.

Monday morning blues again... Dreams!

Morning everyone. Having been in bed most of the week with the flu, the weekend wasn't that much different. I still haven't got over the flu, I didn't even have a voice over the weekend and only got a little bit of it back yesterday. Last night I could not sleep at all, but that did not stop the weird dreams coming around. So that's what this blog for you all is about today. Dreams. But in saying that, before I go into details, when it came to getting up for work this morning, alas, I couldn't get up. I just don't understand why. I don't sleep all night, but when it's time to get up, body says “NO!”

Anyway, back to my two weird dreams. There are two so bear with the weirdness. OK, so my first dream, I'm at the theatre with a friend, I don't know who she is in real life, but in my dream she was a friend. We were going to see... wait for it, Barney on Ice! I know, it sounds totally random, but it gets a lot more odd. So we are seeing Barney on ice, and then guess who turns up? None other than one of my other friends whom we shall call “Worzey” (he knows who he is) don't ask me why he was in my dream, but he was, he was sitting on our table, yes, we had a table, upstairs to be exact, the ice rink bit was downstairs, but we were on a table upstairs, this is where our seats were. There is one more space on the table, and the show is sold out, so we are just waiting for the last person to turn up. Who is it? I hear you cry, well, none other than the gorgeous David Tennant (Why is he leaving Doctor Who?! WHY!!). I don't care what anyone says, he is gorgeous.

So he comes and sits at our table and my friend (whom I don't really have a clue in real life) goes nuts and is all over him. We all start talking and she is stalker like trying to sit next to him (I'm next to him) and get all up close. We have a laugh and then I go to the loo, by the time I get back she's right up next to him, feeling his arms and laughing at everything he says (oh dear) then we see Barney heading downstairs with his ice dancers. On our floor, there was something on the floor that made ice skaters able to skate (I know, don't ask) which just looked like crushed ice. So then this show started and it was very bizarre to say the least. I don't know how they were skating or anything. But then all of a sudden they were pulling the curtains down and a big screen came out of no where and a movie came on.

In this movie which I find quite disturbing, a guy was arguing with his wife and then he hit her and went on to teach her a lesson for messing with him and arguing with him and went on to do er... not very nice things to his daughter... this then turned into a mass thing which was broadcast on the news (in the film!) and he got arrested or something or other, I wasn't there long enough to see the end as I got very upset and stormed out in an array of tears. I get an email from “Worzey” and Mr Dashing David asking if I am OK and I don't answer and run off to sit outside on this bench. A random guy comes up to me and asks how much for a bunch of flowers (which are next to me as there is a flower merchant stand next to the bench) and I look at the prices and one bunch is £3.50 and another bunch is £4.50. So he takes both and pays for them. I take a brown paper bag and put them in there and by that time I am found by “Worzey” and Mr David. We all talk and sort things out then go into the arcade and play on the slot machines. I don't win on those 10p machines where it moves back and forth and you stick 10p in to win monies, but some guy shows me how to win monies and gives me the lot that comes out. Brilliant. Then I walk over to “Worzey” and Mr David and they are both eating big fat juicy burgers and it's all over there faces, very amusing. I walk off back to the slots.

Then I wake up.

Bizarre dream no? Thoughts?

I'll post the other tomorrow.

A Battle of the Sexes

Now this is a constant battle that is never ending between men and women. Which ones are more superior to the other? Well I think it’s about time we weighed the differences between the two.

Now in the olden days when women didn’t have any rights to vote or work or get educated or whatever, all we did was clean, cook, push out babies and generally be something look at. Men were the ones who went out to work to earn le monies so we could live and look after our kids. Women weren’t allowed to do this.

Now when everything changed and women had rights to work, vote, earn some monies, they still earned less than men, but the fact was, they were learning and working. Now I think men found this hard to adjust to because of the whole sexism thing and how men felt they should bring home the bacon and women should still be at home.

However, what they don’t realise is that as well as going out to work, learn, study or whatever, they were STILL doing everything they did before. The cooking, cleaning, popping babies and being sexy. That’s something to be proud of don’t you think?

Now I’m not saying men are completely useless, they work very hard in what they do and are generally great guys, but seriously, where would they be without women? Interesting fact, you know that men’s clothing buttons are on the other side to women’s clothing? Did you know that this was the case because it was easier for women to dress their men and do their buttons up as it faced the correct way for them to dress their husbands? What does that tell you huh? Men didn’t even dress themselves.

Sorry men, but I truly believe you would be nothing without women. You would be sitting at the pubs like a chav, going to the job centre every two weeks to claim your money and generally be overweight good for nothings. Extreme I know, but life is extreme.

Give me counter arguments men. Come on. I think we should all discuss this.

I’m sure it’s a lot more complicated that just some things I’ve said, it goes back a long way in history and I think the issues should be discussed. Oh the psychological repercussions of what I have just said.

Let the battle commence.

Disturbed – Flu + Hornyness

I feel like I understand myself less and less these days. I’ve been at home with the flu all week, bed ridden, snotty nose, cold sweats, coughing fits, dehydrated and not hungry yet none of that bothers me. The flu I can deal with, I get it about 3 – 4 times a year (although this year thank God this is the first time I have it) which I am used to now, it’s the weird side effects that creep me out. As you have guessed from the title… feeling horny. Anyone else get this? Please tell me I am not the only freak out there!

And there isn’t a damn thing I can do about it. I think I will wallow in my own flu pity. Never mind hey? I guess we all have our freaky things. I will also sit here and listen to Muse – Feeling Good. God this song is so sexy it should be illegal. So should the lead singer.

Now yesterday I was talking about how much I liked the Rihanna song Disturbia, and now I am starting to believe I really am disturbed in some way. I’ve not slept properly in God knows how long, and having the flu doesn’t help me getting better if I can’t sleep! I was up all night just feeling crap, sore neck and wide awake. Things like this don’t help the flu. I wish there was something that would help you sleep. Well, I know there is, but nothing works. I think I need new pillows.


When someone doesn’t sleep enough it does things to the brain. It makes you think horrible thoughts and makes you confused about things in your life. I’m used to being confused in my life, but this just tips me over the edge. My minds in Disturbia as Rihanna says.

I still really like her shoes.

Womanizer

So seeing as I am sitting at home with the flu, I thought I would download some music that I have been meaning to. Womanizer by Britney, now being a huge Britney fan, I like this by default so be quiet to all you hater!! LEAVE BRITNEY ALONE! I mean it… What a loser that guy is, he’s become famous by being an absolute mental case, and do you know he’s releasing a single? I wouldn’t be surprised if Britney took out a restraining order for this guy.

I also Like Rihanna (I know, sue me, kill me now) I like Disturbia… I LOVE HER SHOES! Seriously, her shoes are bloody hot in this video, call me weird but I notice things like that.

Shoes, a girl’s essential, as well as Mascara and Concealer and pants. I’m not sure which is most important. I’m going to go with Shoes because people see them and they make us feel sexy, then pants because if we are wearing something sexy then we feel sexy and know we are wearing something underneath that only one person will be able to see. Am I right ladies? What are your essentials? I put Mascara and Concealer last because I usually forget to put them on. But oh well.

I’m keeping this thing short today because I really don’t feel too good to be able to think about a lot. Besides, Britney is making me feel better. WOMANIZER!

Oh I also found this really funny French song by Plastic Bertrand – Ça Plane pour Moi, listen… it’s brilliant.

Flu-y

It’s not fun having to stay in bed because you have the flu. It’s no fun at all. Especially for me as the sheer boredem drives me mental. I need to do something because I am a do-er. However, I know that if I go out I will just make myself worse, serves me right going to the gym yesterday doesn’t it… but that actually made me feel better. I can’t win really.

Medicine, aromatherapy to kill the germs, it did work, kind of. I woke up this morning for work blocked up, tired, couldn’t move, that’s not the way to be. STUPID COLD! TO HELL WITH THE SHIT WEATHER!

We haven’t had a decent summer in 2 years. The government blame global warming and as a result everything has shot up in price. Petrol because cars are bad for the environment. They have invented the hydro-electric powered car, but the release of it won’t be until every single penny is sucked out of us. I feel like I am living in Sherwood Forest with the tax man taking all our monies to keep us more while the King sits laughing at us all. WHERE THE HELL IS ROBIN HOOD WHEN YOU NEED HIM?

Now I was thinking of the cartoon Robin Hood, but then I remembered the BBC series and the Hotty that plays him. COME ON HOTTY! SAVE US!!

What is wrong with the government today anyway? Seriously, it’s not all about money. I’m pretty sure people wouldn’t mind paying taxes as long as it went to something useful other than their wages. And what is this about Gordon Brown wanting to change the law to make everyone automatic organ donors? What is happening to this countries freedom of choice? It’s not his right to be able to decide things like that, it’s ours, and if he puts this law into action then what the hell? Why should we stay in a country where freedom isn’t allowed? I might as well live in prison. Why not get rid of them? They are no use, taking up space and our money!!! I’m not for killing anyone, but if someone has to go, why don’t they?

Bloody shambles this country is. I hope I get to migrate in the next 2 years, don’t want to stay in such a bloody hole like this. We pay tax so we can get free health care but the NHS is a fucking mess. Where is our money going?! What’s the point in paying for something that is free when it doesn’t even work? Why am I paying for prescriptions? I thought it was free? I think they have lost the meaning of the word free. Look it up in a dictionary.

Free:

• Enjoying personal rights or liberty, as a person who is not in slavery: a land of free people.



• Existing under, characterized by, or possessing civil and political liberties that are, as a rule, constitutionally guaranteed by representative government: the free nations of the world.



• Enjoying political autonomy, as a people or country not under foreign rule; independent.



• Exempt from external authority, interference, restriction, etc., as a person or one's will, thought, choice, action, etc.; independent; unrestricted.



• Able to do something at will; at liberty: free to choose.



• Acting without self-restraint or reserve: to be too free with one's tongue.



• Ready or generous in giving; liberal; lavish: to be free with one's advice.



• Not subject to special regulations, restrictions, duties, etc.: The ship was given free passage.



• Of, pertaining to, or characterized by free enterprise: a free economy.
  that may be used by or is open to all: a free market.



• Uncombined chemically: free oxygen.



• Not subject to rules, set forms, etc.: The young students had an hour of free play between classes.



• Without cost, payment, or charge.

Eat that Government.

Sweetcorn, Tea and the Flu.

I'm sitting here drinking a cup of tea and thinking, don't we all just hate Mondays? I mean seriously, Mondays... Monday is the day of the moon (Latin). Now when you think of the moon, you think of night time, and what do people do at night time unless of course you are a) crazy, b) an insomniac? That's right, give yourself a star... SLEEP!

Monday should officially be the day of sleep. I have decided to crown it the day of sleep. Monday glooms are no more for now Monday is the day of the sleep.

So the usual working hours apply 8 – 4pm and waking up this morning feeling like the insides of my nose had exploded is not a good feeling. I have been through the day with my nose deciding that it was going to leak at random so I might as well sit here with a tissue stuffed up my nose. How attractive am I on a scale of 1 – 10? 10 being fitty and 1 being I feel nauseous... I'm going to go with 3.

Some interesting other things I was reading about Monday that the day after Easter is known as Black Monday. It says on dictionary.com that the reason for it's reputation as Black Monday is a mystery but these people are so 1756 isn't it obvious? BLACK MONDAY! The day after Easter Sunday... what do people do on Easter Sunday? Eat shit loads of chocolate until they can't physically eat any more, or until you run out of chocolate. So Black Monday is named as such because you spend the whole day feeling sick and vowing never to eat chocolate ever again. Black Monday!

Now the dictionary also says it's the second day of the week... how is this possible? I thought in the biblical sense Sunday was the last day of the week known as the day of rest? You know, God made the world in 6 days and on the 7th he lay to rest. Or something. So how can it possibly be the second day of the week? I think someone has got their wires crossed in le bible... or I may have just proven that God doesn't exist... HOLD THE FORT!!! HOW DARE I SAY SOMETHING SO BLASPHEMOUS!! Meh... I'll get over it.

I hate Mondays.

More so when I feel like little gnomes are chiselling away at the insides of my nose.